Why I Wouldn’t Recommend Reading my First Two Books

 

The Rewrite of the Rewrite

I am aware I have not posted many Journals this year. I have been on an edit, which is near completion.

I have made grave errors in the past. It is not simply a matter of running a spell check. I am very earnest this time, the self-doubt produced by previous mistakes is a struggle.

I wouldn’t recommend my first two books to anyone. In fact, I’d discourage you from reading them. They contain embarrassments which would make readers twitch. Thinking about it today, I picked up my first book and cringed as I flipped through the pages.

Being vowel blind, in constant battle with wriggling red lines, I can only think I was fighting so hard that all I could do was sigh with relief when they disappeared.

Lesson learned. My only apologetic stance - I may republish my first two books but don’t have the energy at the moment.

I have few regrets. It was all part of a valuable learning process and I am sure I am not alone.

Self-published books are notoriously riddled with typos, spelling mistakes, bad grammar and plot holes. I have tried to enlist reading friends but the truth is no one is as invested in a book as the author. It’s too much to ask others to give their time.

Traditionally published books have the benefit of development and style editing. They have professionally designed covers and interiors. The kindest onlooker would have to admit there’s not much hope of producing something as perfect.

What I will say is DON’T RUSH IT.

Don’t let feigned interest or your own eagerness get you in a half nelson to complete without stringent edits. It simply isn’t worth all the mistakes you’ll find in print or on kindle, especially if you are like me.

I’m the old adage of a story teller rather than a writer. Writers are more technically involved in their craft. I have ideas which spiral out of control and take up the greater part of me until they are outside my brain. Then I have another one and start typing again.

I joke that my favourite read through is the 25th because after that I stop counting. It’s what I choose to do and there’s no way round it. If you are not an expert, that’s what it takes. You read, make notes, read again and hope you will make it work somehow.

It’s true that when I wrote my first two books I didn’t have enough money to do things properly, I forgive myself.

This time round I have hired a proficient proofreader.

I had to force myself to send emails to various advertised people and companies. Like anything else the hardest part was deciding whether it would be worth the money.

Having made that bold move I found I had contacted some shrewd movers and businessmen who called me before I had closed my laptop.

I actually said “I’ve only just stood up!” to one of them.

They were very efficient and pushy. I could have easily been backed into a corner but I held my own, I had a list and wouldn’t make a decision until I’d heard from everyone.

A London based firm was so bossy they told me not to disclose their quote to competitors. Though they claimed my story would be given a sympathetic eye, they gave me no confidence regarding the use of a Norfolk accent. Feeling my book would be more about their needs than mine I crossed them off the list.

A voice in the back of my head kept telling me I needed someone local, who wouldn’t declare it all grammatically incorrect and undo the thought I had given to dialogue.

The same voice kept telling me that I already knew of a decent local woman. Someone from the accounts department at the Moller Centre, Cambridge, had mentioned a proofreader following a conversation about writing. What I remembered the most was she had said how easy the lady was to talk to.

I Googled and came across Quick Brown Fox and Suzanne Williams. Sure this was the right person, I sent an email, explaining about the Norfolk difficulties.

Suzanne said she would be happy to proofread and that she had Norfolk connections and understood my intention, going so far as to explain differences she had noticed between various East Anglian accents and the way many actors use a Cornish accent in an East Anglian role.

I feel the need to explain - you should not intend to find someone who usually edits work documents.

Suzanne was clearly the right choice for me and had previous relevant experience, understood the brief.

The other kind of proofreader might use punctuation which is not usual in fiction. I know avid readers who say they feel colons have no place in fiction. At the end of the day it’s the authors’ choice but, as a result of such comments, I prefer not to be too formal.

Four weeks was agreed upon and Suzanne finished before the deadline. Far from my work being brutalised by a stranger, a document was sent back showing track changes, which I could accept or reject.

Suzanne had even found a spelling error in a Buddhist chant. I haven’t got time to explain what that was doing in East Anglia but she is good. I cannot thank her enough. Talking to her in emails, she said she would go to the church I had borrowed an 18th century inscription from – to look at it. I could not fault her dedication and she sorted out so many other matters which Word had made me believe correct.

Word is not your friend if you writing a book. I had thought I knew about punctuation in speech but it had contradicted me and I had been foolish enough to make many changes on its advice, even though I felt it interrupted the flow. When I got the manuscript back from Suzanne, I realised I should have trusted my gut over technology.

The truth is, Word thinks you are writing a business document. I have tried various writing aids but I found writing became more about pop ups, suggestions and other irritating factors, though I could see the point in using Grammarly for spelling. Hemingway Editor is also good but is based on Hemingway principals, which you could learn and remember without something in the background nudging you when creativity is more important.

How far am I from publishing my Book?

Amanda Drake’s Heart is nearly ready.

I know it has been advertised on my website for quite some time but I have taken my past experiences seriously.

There is a maddening bell ringing within me which wants to call time on it and get on with writing the sequel but I spent nearly a year on this book, much more if you consider the research behind the multiple subjects within the larger story. At the end of the day, I don’t want to ruin the fleeting moment of joy I will have when it enters the world.

My conclusion is, work on it, rest then look again. Don’t be so lost in the process that you can’t see what others will inevitably find. More importantly enjoy what you are doing. If you haven’t got a deadline or traditional deal, don’t pressure yourself.

When you self-publish you do every task yourself but the real joy is being your own boss. I’ve given up telling people what I’m writing about, with the exception of my mother-in-law who is enthusiastic and doesn’t sit in judgement.

Friends are different, they will want to say what they would wish to be in a book, whilst not necessarily being interested.

I might be unfair to others but if you want your original content to be just that, use your own ideas and imagination. Keep it on the low, as the kids say, and I’m sure your writing will be worth reading.

My last words on hiring a proofreader or editor aren’t actually mine. Suzanne had a quote on one of her pages.

Don’t spoil the ship for a ha’pworth of tar.

I’ll leave you to find out the origins of that magnificent phrase. It might not mean what you think.

 Till next time. Happy writing.

 Rachel

Journal 2024 and a Detour to Orkney

My First Journal of 2024

I have pangs of guilt because this is my first post of 2024. I’m afraid I sloped off, to do a number of other things.

First of all there was the matter of my, long advertised, book Amanda Drake’s Heart. There were times it felt so close to completion but it wasn’t anywhere near. I have been slaving on its finer points.

We have all seen movies, in which an author types meticulously to the words THE END and enjoys a celebratory glass of Champagne. I can tell you now, those words are the beginning of great self-criticism and an endless list of changes.

Am I any closer to finishing it? The jury is still out, though I have started researching and writing a sequel.

I’m afraid that is what happens to me. When I get to the editing stage, my mind wonders onto the next idea. When you have read your own book twenty times, you have to walk away because you can no longer see the flaws.

Feeling very much in need of a break, I went to Orkney for a week and let the dust settle on my manuscript.

I have some beautiful pictures and a little local knowledge of Orkney, which I will put at the end of this blog. After sitting alone, writing for months on end, it was a true adventure.

When I think back, there were other bits of life which I allowed to take over for a while. Events on the world stage were pretty depressing. The other factor, which latched onto a generally depressed atmosphere, was a bit of friendly advice. Some books shouldn’t be out there, apparently.  

I have got a grip now and completely understand the ‘gentle word in my ear’. I’ve since put on my There goes my last flying damn T-shirt and thrown myself back into the process.

Motivation. It’s Not That Easy

I suppose the biggest factor is procrastination. It is not easy to get up in the morning, swig some coffee and plug in your laptop. Writing takes self-belief, in the face of family and friends who simply can’t understand what I’m doing. Though I’m lucky, I can stay at home and do what I like, which is creating stories.

Now I have shaken off a ‘mild case of the blues’, I call it that because I am not permitted to have depression, there are still a number of sticking points when it comes to motivating myself.

Mattresses are comfortable and sometimes cats are on your lap. Social media is interesting and there are people you know who are also skiving off work and there is always housework.

I’m very aware that being home alone means I must undertake the lion’s share of mundane things and I am very grateful to my partner, who covered my expenses for the two years it took to write my first book. I cannot fault his generosity and he still makes sacrifices to help keep me motivated.

Last Bank Holiday was no exception. Having driven to Birmingham to spend Easter Sunday with his mother, he undertook a 150 mile round trip to assist me with my writing.

I only wanted to know the smallest of facts for a tiny part of a chapter.

One question, which was bugging me, was the lay of the land around an area previously inhabited by my mother’s ancestors. Yes, there were hills, despite it being very close to salt marshes and river estuaries.

The second question was about the kind of houses built in the era I am writing about. Fortunately there was no rewrite required, Google Earth had shown me the correct images. (Please don’t tell him.) He was, however, very entertained by the name of the small hamlet we visited, as some of my characters had settled down in Fingringhoe, Essex.

The sign leading into the picturesque village says, “Fingringhoe, Please Drive Carefully.” We could only think that you would.

Having patiently waited for me look around St. Andrew’s Church, my partner declined a drink at The Whale Bone Public House, which has a nice garden and a reputation for good food. He tempted me away with the possibility of a seaside walk, thinking he had paid quite enough for fuel.

I made the mistake of chatting about an explanation of the nursery rhyme Humpty Dumpty, which was that Humpty Dumpty was a huge cannon, owned by the King during the English Civil War, set upon a wall/tower in nearby Colchester. (If you would like to know more about the siege of Colchester…. Check out In the Margins Beyond the Expected, YouTube, rather than me boring you too! One Eyed Thomas may not be your thing. By the 1700s the riddle of Humpty Dumpty turned Humpty into an egg and Lewis Carol was the person who gave Humpty a face in Through the Looking Glass.)

When I finished reciting this fascinating, to me, story, my partner headed back toward a Suffolk motorway, concluding the sighting of a Lighthouse ship on the River Colne, as close to the sea as he could be bothered to go. We grabbed a service station Sandwich.

I can’t complain, he had well and truly gone above and beyond.

(Local fact, Essex Egg Mayo is made with Salad Cream in some establishments. Who’d have thunk it?)

Detour to Orkney

I didn’t get to see as much of Orkney as you might expect. My purpose there was to help a friend, whose partner had been seriously ill.

Elaine’s old house: right, The Meeting Place, St. Margaret’s Hope

Her partner’s illness had caused concern about their location. They had lived a number of years in 200 hundred year old house at St. Margaret’s Hope on South Ronaldsay, which you can only reach by ferry or a journey across the Churchill Barriers, built by Italian Prisoners of War to stop U-Boats passing between the many Islands which make up Orkney. In an emergency it wouldn’t be possible to get a sick person from Ronaldsay to hospital, on the outskirts of Kirkwall in certain kinds of weather. So my friend had managed to get a less remote bungalow on the mainland.

I have to say here that my friend, Elaine, was an expert at navigating the barriers, having seen her time the passing of a point on one of them, where bus-sized waves had been crashing over it.

Waves, I found, are a fact of life on Orkney. Passing over a road between two beaches, near Elaine’s new home, we were hunted down by one, as if it were a predatory animal. We watched its approach as it took a mischievous shape, slapping up a nearby stretch of land, then stared hopelessly through the foam covered windscreen, trying to see the road ahead. Elaine was quite cool about it, “That happens too.”

I am not a very adventurous traveller and could understand her partner’s explanation of their move being down to the barriers being ‘a bit splashy’ when he had returned from a long stay in hospital. When Elaine had told me not to visit in October, because of the wind, I had no idea what Orkney winds were like and booked my ticket thinking “How bad can it be?” I soon found out.

South Ronaldsay hasn’t much shelter between it and Norway and the autumn wind is an assault on the senses. I found this out when I went for my first walk with Elaine’s dogs on the beach by the Kirk, near Grimness. A wall of wind made walking difficult and fair emptied my lungs and dried my mouth. My second walk, with my old friend Mally, at the beach near The Viking Totem was even harsher. 

That is when I really began to worry about my return journey.

The bad weather I had seen during my transfer at Edinburgh airport to a two prop’ plane had unnerved me enough, though I had missed the tail end of Storm Babet. The jet I had taken from City Airport, London, had struggled with landing in high winds. All I managed to see, through the blackness, were white spinning wind turbines, sticking through heavy clouds, as we landed.

When I found the Departure Gate for the ‘little plane’, I comforted myself that it couldn’t be that little, as all the seats there became occupied. Then three oil refinery workers rolled up and surveyed the scene.

“They won’t fit all they on there.” Said one.

“Someone will have to die.” Joked another.

I clocked up 10,000 points, playing Woodoku on my phone to ease my nerves, as it became apparent everyone else, bar three American tourists, knew at least one other waiting passenger.

“And where are you coming from, Sheila?” Someone asked the lady sitting behind me.

Sheila had been on a jewellery making course in Italy but hadn’t seen much of the little village she had been staying in because there had been thunderstorms and floods. (Yes, I am nosy.) But that’s not the end of it. Unless I’m completely delusional, I think the Sheila in question may possibly have been Sheila Fleet, who owns a lovely chapel Gallery and Restaurant, at Tankerness, which I visited during an errand with Elaine.

If you ever have the chance to visit Orkney, please do go there. I bought a lovely silver broach in the church Gallery, which was an interpretation of the Birsay Disk, found in 1975 on the small tidal island, inhabited by artisan jewellers in the 7/8th century.

If you are not into jewellery gazing, I would recommend a visit to the remote restaurant, not least because it is a lovely drive in the wilderness and they serve the best Apple Crumble Cake I have ever tasted.

Being busy, we did not go into the Italian Chapel, though we passed it many times. It is made out of two war time Nissan Huts and was built by the same Italian Prisoners of War who built the barriers. I have seen pictures of its interior and it looks a fascinating place to visit. Two original painted panels were apparently taken from outside the chapel during a renovation and have never been located.

I did have a day roaming around with my friend and her dogs. We went first to Scapa Flow, the place famously known for the deliberate scuttling of a German war fleet, when their Captain did not know talks had been extended by 3 days and feared his fleet being commandeered for use by the British. From that point, a tragedy took place. Many of the unarmed Germans, jumping ship, where shot in the water.

I got as far as the standing stones at Stenness, and withstood the wind at the lighthouse, by Zanzibar Cottage, of TV’s Top Gear fame. (In case you don’t know. Richard Hammond, Jeremy Clarkson and James May raced their cars up the length of the UK to try and beat the Royal Mail by delivering a letter to Zanzibar Cottage…. And that little two prop’ plane, which seldom stops running, ensured they were beaten.)

I can’t tell you very much more about Orkney. What I did enjoy was not being a tourist. I think, just running about dropping things at Kirkwall charity shops and shopping for the move, picking up various bits Elaine had found for sale online, and going to supermarkets, gave me a more personal view of the Islands.

I particularly liked four waiting cars being considered a traffic jam and the lovely locals, who did not hesitate to speak to me.

The freshness and quality of all the food I ate, both at my friend’s home and in South Ronaldsay’s pubs was second to none I’ve experienced away from home. Contrary to what I had expected, being on a treeless Island, there was plenty of local produce.

I ate at Robertson’s Coffee Hoose & Bar and the food was simple and well presented, the beer well-kept and tasty. I noted, with amusement, people waiting with their dogs outside the front door one lunch time, looking very merry. The bus picked them up on its way by. I’m told that the bus drivers are very accommodating and stop whenever/wherever they are waved down.

The Murray Arms Hotel, was where I had the best Fish & Chips ever. We had two stabs at getting food here, because Elaine had forgotten that it was now ‘winter’ and they only served food for a couple of hours. We missed the first day and were successful the next. Despite the kitchen being open for a tiny window of time, the landlady timed a take away box for Elaine’s partner with our leaving.

Elaine said the kind landlady’s father was a fisherman and had probably brought our dinner into the bay early that morning.

Despite its traditional stone walls, The Murray Arms is quite modern and has beautifully clean facilities. It claims En-Suite Accommodation and I would certainly book myself in if I wanted to see St. Margaret’s Hope again….01856 831205…if you are interested in a stay there. It’s a short distance from the ferry, if you are hiking and want a good base. On-line booking is also available.

If you asked me what my favourite part of my 7 day stay was, I would have to say the few minutes’ walk to the local Post Office in St. Margaret’s Hope, in the morning. I loved the quiet easy feeling about the place and the ferry waiting at the end of the harbour, with a nearby seal sheltering in the bay. I looked forward to running out of milk.

I understand, coming from a tourist town myself, that things may be a tad more industrious in the summer months but autumn was truly relaxing and, remote as it was, St. Margaret’s Hope had everything I needed to hand.

My last day on Orkney was spent laying carpets at my friend’s new bungalow, on the North side of Orkney, and helping to unload their belongings. At about half past three, I put down my Stanley knife and waited to see if Elaine made it back, from her old house on Ronaldsay, to give me a lift to the airport.

She did return to get me to the airport on time, slightly hampered by road works, which left me looking anxiously at the end of the runway, in a genuine jam.

I was really sad to say goodbye to my old friend and Orkney. I wouldn’t hesitate to go back, though the twilight journey, in heavy winds, on that brave sturdy little plane isn’t something I would like to do again in autumn. I think, perhaps, it would be nice to go again in spring and see all the new lambs and wild life, of which there is plenty.

I have put footage of my dusk departure below. I apologise for it not being edited. If you just want to see the take-off, as opposed to the plane ambling past the fields and sea views, fast forward to about 6.5 minutes.

The experience was such that I feel I must go to more remote places, who knows what I may have to show you in blogs to come.

Many Thanks for your time and interest. Take care, till next time.

Rachel.

Added apologies for there being no recipes or cleaning tips this time round. It was a running joke, induced by my first blog and I have found it an added strain during the last stages of editing.

Want to Know What it’s Like to Self-Publish?

 The Self-Publishing Journey

When you’ve finished writing your first book, you tend to sit glazed with achievement. Being artistic and not used to business means thinking about getting published can be just that. Reading about what to do next is daunting.

I first heard about Self- Publishing through a receptionist at The Moller Institute. He overheard me, saying I didn’t think I was good enough to get published, and told me about Amazon KDP. It brought me hope.

The traditional route is to get an agent and send letters of introduction with sample chapters, perfectly formatted to each publisher’s specifications. It being recommended you approach each publisher in turn, you become aware getting your book to print could take years. There will be a constant stream of rejections and suggestions for a rewrite of your baby.

Asking for advice on the internet can bring an avalanche of ‘interested’ Vanity Publishers, who charge printing fees and do little marketing. Should you choose this path, you could be left with boxes of books to sell under your own steam.

I have lost count of the amount of writers I have seen in internet chatrooms rejoicing because they have been approached by a Vanity Publisher. Their joy has cold water thrown on it when those in the know jump in to save them from an expensive disappointment.

(I cannot express how worthwhile it is to join writer’s groups on Facebook etc. If you make the effort, you will find support and advice. It will rid you of things which will haunt you and combat beginner’s misconceptions, such as, people wanting to steal your ideas. You will be quickly kicked into touch with nurturing words. The worst that will happen is a good chat with someone who understands, writing can be lonely.)

The answer is not the path of least resistance but the one of least expense. A good publisher will cover costs and it is in their best interest to make sales.

Individuals who have their own marketing strategy may take to Vanity Publishers but, if you want to get your book published quickly, with minimal outlay, platforms like Amazon run a Print on Demand service.

This means your manuscript is kept on file and only printed when a customer makes an order. Printing costs are covered by the price of the book and you get royalties for each sale.

Problem solved, I hear you say, but I can assure you every bit of the process will make you see more questions than answers.

If you do your own research, which I highly recommend, you will find there are a number reputable companies out there.

Publish Drive, Barnes & Noble Press, Apple Books, Google Play Books, Ingram Spark, Kobo Writing Life and Dreame, are all possibilities I would expect you to explore. There are many more. Choice is down to the individual.

I chose Kindle Direct Publishing and will share a rough outline of the process with you, in the hope it will help you decide whether it’s for you.

The first thing you will have to do is sign up with your platform (You need to sign up as an Amazon customer to use Kindle Direct Publishing – KDP.)

Before I dive into the basics, it’s important that you choose a genre, and sub-genre.

It doesn’t matter how unique you may think your work is, you will need to know what to class it as. Take a good look at books which are already out there and consider where you would place your work to hit your target market.

You will be asked to input phrases and words to help the right readers find your work.

Think deeply about this.

Go to online book stores and search, using words you have chosen, to see what they suggest you read. Keep the words which have produced the most apt results and dump anything obscure, always remembering you will have to have something a little different in there to have the search edge on similar items.

Cover

 

In the first instance you will be uploading a front cover only. This is known as a Thumbnail. I will cover the process for paperback later on.

You will need a cover, even for an eBook.

I should point out, if you make a different cover for the paperback version of your book, the original thumbnail image will be the one potential readers see when searching for a new read. Choose well!

There is a cover creator on Amazon but I didn’t take to it. There’s nothing wrong with it but I don’t think I studied the provided videos well enough, so looked for another way.

Shuffling through YouTube, I found Nuria Corbi, Homeboss, who calmly talked me through joining Canva and using it to create a hassle-free book covers. There is a free version of Canva available, though you have greater freedom and access to more varied images if you subscribe.

Nuria is very with it and has heaps of other skills you might find useful. Whenever I’m stuck, I look her up. She has saved me so much time.

If you have got a bit of cash put aside for your project, there are people out there who have a genius for creating covers. If you join a writer’s group, you can ask for suggestions.

I love the work of one designer who frequents The Writer’s Forum. David Gardias has his own Facebook page, Best Selling Covers by David Gardias. He has a flare which makes you realise the level you must work to, so much so that he has people trying to copy his work.

Please, be original. It’s better to think about which genre you may be working in and look at what kind of things sell, then make a cover relevant to your storyline.

If you look at the kind of work David Gardias usually does and his commissioned work, you’ll realise he has his own style but is not a one trick pony. He’s very capable of working to an author’s brief to create something unique.

 .

You won’t always hit the mark. I have one book published with a very average cover. This isn’t really a problem to fix at a later stage.

You’ll have to un-publish your book, which is simple enough, and create a second addition with the new cover, which will need a new ISBN Number if it is in hardcover/paperback (as you go through the process you will be offered one automatically)

Don’t panic, you can take down manuscripts and covers and repeat the first steps you took to publish.

I hope knowing this will make you feel more secure.

We’ve all made mistakes. They don’t have to be there forever. There is a Kindle Previewer, which you can download to your Desktop, to spot any mistakes before you put your manuscript into the system. It’s free!

(Upload, open the Previewer, click on Open Book. Your own files will open and you can, double click on your manuscript, choose the Open button, or drag and drop your file, it’s very versatile.)

The best advice I can give you is to take your time, get to know what you are doing rather than rushing in. I suffered greatly from my need to publish ASAP. I would wake up in the morning, determined to press the publish button. Most days, I did not reach for the button but ended up discovering layers of snags, or things I hadn’t thought through.

Almost all my ‘publishing days’ were spent watching videos and reading articles. This was so much the case, I was actually astonished the day I publish my first book.

Even then, reading through it on Kindle, I saw some outstanding mistakes. Lesson learned, get others to proof read and an editor, if you can afford one. Asking for help from writer’s groups is a good idea again. Some writers hand out just a few chapters to several willing internet friends to proof read.

Bear with me, this may seem long winded. In fact it is very condensed information compared to years of trial, error and endless research.

 

Images within Text Manuscript

I know I usually say don’t sweat the small stuff but there are some very important things to remember about images within text, which could save you hours of frustration.

If you are using downloaded photographs, which I did for my mother’s travel memoirs, you must get things right at the download/scanning stage, before you save them. When using photographs, you should adjust contrast, brightness, colours, tones etc. first.

Whether you are scanning or downloading images from a design platform, you should reduce the file size as far as you can without affecting quality.

I would recommend you save scanned photos and downloaded designs as jpg. This format seems to fit all. However, if you are putting artistic images into text e.g. Pretty images next to chapter headings, PDF is easier, as you can use Apps to make them compatible with Word.

I do this by making Logos of images on Canva, downloading them to my laptop, then open them in Wordshark (free, from I love PDF) and change their format to Word from PDF. They work very well and it only takes a few minutes. I love PDF has other Apps which will convert pretty much anything to anything. It’s free.

I know I have said this before but, never click on the blue anchor on the edge of your image. This will make your image immovable, permanently.

The only way you will be able to get rid of it, when it becomes a static hindrance, is to grab the top right hand corner with your mouse and make it so small it will not be visible. (Once it is invisible to you in Word, it shouldn’t show up in KDP. I’ve done it and know.)

 

Uploading your Manuscript

By the time you get to upload your manuscript you will feel naturally anxious. I worried a lot about questions which answered themselves as I dived into the process.

When you go to KDP, you will find you need to fill out details you may not have thought about before.

You will need to have the International Sort Code to the bank account you wish to have your royalties paid into and to sign a declaration saying you will pay your taxes, if you live outside the USA.

You will be given boxes to fill in your book title and author name, if different from your real name.

You will have the option to create your cover, using Amazon software. Otherwise choose, Browse, and your files will open on the Amazon page. Choose your file and open it. It will load into the system easily, unless you haven’t formatted it appropriately. Don’t forget I have already written about formatting an eBook on my site.

If you have an issue, you will be given prompts to follow, and suggestions as to what the problem may be, in the side bar in red.

There may be videos about issues, which you can watch without leaving the page.

Watch the video and have a break. Take notes. You will know what to do by the end of it. They really do hold your hand all the way through the process, though some writers believe you need a degree to get through it. Perhaps they haven’t found the tutorials.

If you Google KDP University, you will find all the help you need in their pre-recorded webinars.

The first option is to publish an eBook. This should be very straight forward. You don’t even need to have page numbers for this, but you should have a clickable Table of Contents, to help the reader navigate.

Checklist 

Copyright Notice

Disclaimer

Forward

Dedications or quote (if you wish)

Have you checked the Chapter Numbers are in sequence?

YOU WILL NEED YOUR SALES BLURB AND BRIEF DISCRIPTION OF YOUR BOOK, SPELL CHECKED AND READY TO UPLOAD IN A SEPARATE FILE! You can try to do it on the day, if you like, but will find the writing small and hard to see, though there is a spellchecker within the box.

When you have uploaded your file, you will be told approximately how long it will take for your eBook to be published. If there are any issues, you’ll be alerted and sent messages about them. It usually says 72 hours but appears for sale within hours or the next day.

The option to turn your book into a printable version will be left open as a suggestion and you can go back and do this at any point after publishing a Kindle addition. If you proceed to Paperback, remember to put your ISBN Number in your Copyright Notice.

Paperback

Your paperback cover will have to be front, back and spine.

Your publisher should have a Cover Calculator, usually displayed on the panel to the left of your main screen, which will offer you a correctly sized cover template, so your spine will fit the number of pages correctly.

Open the Zip File and upload it to whichever system you have chosen to design your cover. If you want the front cover to be the same as your thumbnail, you can simply drag and drop it onto the cover template! Some people find this easier to do by having both windows open on the same page (Window button, left and right arrow, in case you didn’t know)

You will have to take into consideration the bleed zone in this file. Nothing significant should be anywhere near the bleed zone, shown by a red perforated line around the edge, but you must take the edge of your design right up to it.

When placing your cover image you must remember that Amazon allows a certain amount of movement, only within millimetres of the original measurement. Try to make sure there is nothing important outside this guide, it could be cut off.

You’ve got to get through some stringent quality control here.

I had little confidence at this point, so made and published a notebook, using a cute picture of my cat, to make sure I knew how things would pan out.

Title and author name on the spine must be central. Whoever checks the cover is duty bound to say no if it’s badly placed.

You’ll also have to really work out what you are doing with the back cover and leave adequate space in the bottom right hand corner for a bar code, which will be automatically placed there. You do have the option to put your own bar code. I have no advice on that, I’ve never had a reason to do it.

If you are working with Canva, have already designed your cover, you can resize the spine to fit the number of pages easily, according to the measurements of the book template. If you have added more pages, perhaps an About the Author section at the back of the book, KDP will tell you if it affects the spine size.

You can copy and adapt your original manuscript to a new document, to upload for your paperback version.

You can use the same Table of Contents, and update entire table, but you will need to use Headers and Footers to add Page Numbers. Page Numbers shouldn’t occur until the first page of Chapter 1.

You will need an inside Title Page, which should be on a RIGHT hand page.

At some point you may have to insert a blank page, because any first page of a chapter should be on a right hand page. That said, it’s not compulsory.

You can still use the Kindle Previewer to see how your layout will look for your paperback.

You will be given a set of options about the dimensions of your book. Know what size you would like. Look at appropriate books around the house.

If you are using Canva you can swap from inches to centimetres with one click but a tape measure is useful if you feel uncertain.

Once you’ve got your dimensions, there will be options about the kind of paper you would like.

Note, when you are looking at these options, some of them may not be available for all sizes. Look closely at footnotes next to the options.  Make sure you have already thought about whether you want a glossy or mat finish for your cover, cream paper or white for your interior.

(I say this to save you from losing flow. The system won’t let you make a mistake, it will simply stop you until you’ve made a decision)

At the end of each form page, there is a button for saving, before continuing to the next page.

You can take as long as you like to complete the hardcover or paperback process – but you should always go to the bottom of the page and save before leaving the site or shutting down your computer.

The last process is the upload, which will be your opportunity to ask for an Author’s Copy.

I found, on Amazon, the most important thing to do, once you’ve pressed the button, is to look quickly for the Authors Copy request box, which will show itself for a short time.

This gives you a stay of execution for paperback and hardcovers. You wait for your Author’s Copy to arrive at your address and check everything thoroughly before you publish.

There will be other things you may discover along the way but I’ve covered the basics and hopefully saved you hours of nervously watching videos before you dare to begin.

Don’t let the videos on YouTube, which say it’s a quick and easy process, make you feel small and dim. You will need some staying power but it is very doable.

Top Tip: Find a young person if you are stuck. My daughter often makes useful suggestions.

If you are looking for my recipe of the month and cleaning tips please see below.

Happy writing,

Rachel.

Homemade Marmalade

I’ve chosen this month’s recipe because it fits in well with October’s cleaning tip. If you wish to try my homemade Citrus Cleaner you can take a potato peeler to five of the oranges used in the recipe before you begin and put the slithers of peel to one side.

The traditional method of preparing your jars for jams and preserves is to warm them through gently in the oven, to kill off any microbes. I have always timed the ending of my dishwasher programme with the completion of my jam making and have had no problems with mould etc.

The most important thing is to make sure that the jars are sterile and still warm when you pour your jam into them. Pouring hot liquids straight into cold glass can make it shatter.

Recipe

3 Kg  Large Oranges (Seville are best but not essential)

1 Kg  White Granulated Sugar

The juice of 1 Lemon and 2 Limes

1 Small drop of Vanilla Essence

3 Clean jars with airtight lids

1 Small pan

1 Large, thick bottomed pan

1 Medium sized pan of boiling water/ two electric kettles full

Method

1.       Peel the Oranges and keep the rind of three of them to one side.

2.       Chop the fruit of the Oranges and place them into the Large Pan, making sure that there is not too much of the bitter white pith attached to them.

3.       Cut the peel of the 3 Oranges you put aside to the size you would like in your Marmalade and place it in the Small Pan. Cover the peel with boiling water and add the drop of Vanilla and 2 Tablespoons of the sugar. Bring the pan to the boil.

4.       Put the remaining sugar in the Large Pan with the cut Orange Fruit. Add the Lemon and Lime Juice and cover to 2 inches above the top of the fruit and bring the pan to the boil.

5.       Reduce down both pans until the liquid condensed to a thick syrup.

6.       Turn the pan containing the Peel off when the liquid becomes syrupy.

7.       Keep boiling the Large Pan until the syrup begins to thicken.

8.       Before the syrup in the Large Pan becomes too thick, take it off the heat and pass it through a sieve.

9.       Clean the Large Pan and quickly return the clear syrup to the heat.

10.   Boil the syrup, testing small samples of the juice on the back of a Wooden Spoon, to see if you can draw a line through it with a Teaspoon. It will be reduced adequately when the line you draw wrinkles at the edges and does not attempt to flow back to fill the line.

11.   Drain the peel in the Small Pan, with a spoon or sieve, and add it to the clear syrup in the Large Pan.

12.   Put the mixture into your sterile, warm, jars and cover the top of the Marmalade with clean disks of greaseproof paper and screw the lids down firmly, making sure no air is able to get in.

How to Make Your Own Citrus Cleaner

I have chosen this tip because, if you wish, it may go hand in hand with my Marmalade recipe (It will take a little longer as Seville Oranges will need a bit of knife work to remove any flesh from the peal.)

I discovered it because, when I worked in Hotel Housekeeping, I was pretty miffed when a new manager took away our Citra Cleaner and exchanged it for several other cleaning products.

Citra is a universal cleaner. It cleans waxed and varnished wood, mirrors, laminates and tiled floors with ease and dissolves light limescale without the need of chemicals. It is an amazing de-greaser and will not harm stainless metal kitchen appliances. It makes chrome shine bright and is completely harmless if dropped on most coloured carpets. What’s more, if a child ingests a mouth full, it won’t taste pleasant but will not require a trip to A&E.

Faced with the prospect of accidentally using the wrong bottle of product on an unsuited surface, in an expensive setting, I took my revenge by buying a highly concentrated citrus cleaner from the local health food shop. At least my life would be easier at home.

Pleased with my purchase, of which one cap full made 10 litres of solution, I shared the information with friends.

The citric concentrate cost a lot but, once we tried it, we realised 1 drop with 600mls of tap water filled a spray bottle. We were saving money and a load of plastic bottles.

The crunch came when one of my friends broke the sad news to me. She had needed another bottle and found it was no longer available, not even online!

I went on the internet to try to find something to replace it. There was only the original product which we had been used at the hotel, also a concentrate, but it was astronomical because it only came in industrial quantities.

I decided to look into how the product was made and, a few short videos later, realised it was easy to make at home. It works just as well and is actually better on wood than the original.

You Will Need

A large jar, with a tightly fitting lid

A bag of Satsumers, or Manderine style, easy peal, oranges

White distilled vinegar (enough to fill the jar of your choice)

A clean spray bottle (second hand and well washed is fine)

Method

Peel the oranges, making sure that none of the fruit is attached to it.

Put the peel in your clean dry jar and cover to the top with the distilled white vinegar. Make sure it is covered completely. The vinegar should only cost about 29 pence a bottle at your local supermarket, so don’t skimp on it.

If you like, you can add a drop of your favourite essential oil at this stage.

Lavender is nice but I use Cedar or Cypress. I love the smell and the trees the oil comes from are brilliant at protecting themselves from fungus.

This is especially good for preventing mould on bathroom tiles and walls. Cedar and Cypress also do a good job keeping bugs away from wardrobes. This is why traditional linen boxes were made from them.

The light oils in the orange skin also have antibacterial qualities and are safe to use around children and pets but bear in mind, cats are not great lovers of citrus fruit – don’t use it to clean litter trays or feeding areas. A mild solution of dish washing solution is better for that.

You will need a bit of patience as the prepared jar must be tightly sealed and left in a dark, cool place or refrigerator for at least two weeks.

Once the vinegar has turned a lovely mellow orange, pass it through a sieve and decant it into your clean spray bottle. Shake the bottle well before us, to disperse the natural oils evenly throughout the mixture.

I recommend you spray it on your cloth rather than directly onto surfaces, at least until you know how your particular batch is working.

When your bottle is half empty, you will have to prepare another batch but I’m sure you will be pleased with this cheap and efficient homemade, environment friendly cleaner.

Disclaimer. I take no responsibility for any damage to your furniture/household equipment etc. though I know this cleaner is harmless compared to many shop brought products. I will also take the time to tell you, it’s obviously not recommended if you are allergic to any of the ingredients.

Write What You Know

I have found people need to relate writing to something they know but have been unsuccessful in deliberate attempts to write in a particular genre. So far, I pick one when I am ready.

Maybe I am haphazard in my approach, but I’m not a crime writer or any such specialist. I get an idea and go with the flow. It gives me more creative freedom. When you have spelling issues to contend with, you need that.

The only advice I follow is…

Write What You Know!

There’s no point writing about places and situations you’ve never been through. People who have that knowledge who will be glad to point out any deficiencies.

If you are writing about an imagined land and creatures of your own making, that’s fine. There’s nothing to compare it to.

When I say write about what you know, I mean in the way Graham Greene wrote suspense.

As a journalist, he experienced political tension and the life of a spy, travelling to faraway places and relaying details back to MI6.

He had probably lived in paranoia long before his ties with MI6. Since his school days, he had a disorder comparable with Bipolar.

His paranoia and Catholicism contributed to the authenticity of Brighton Rock and The Power and the Glory.

He used what he knew to build a scene. He made the landscapes and cities he passed through his backdrop, his endless restlessness and infidelity to write about guilt.

If Greene had been an atheist monogamist who had stayed in the home-counties, would we have any of his writing?

It’s possible, descriptions of the mundane can bring brilliance.

In terms of writing what you know, I remember being baffled when I found out the writer of Shirley Valentine was a man! I then thought about the fact Shirley spoke to a wall. That made more sense.

I often talk to myself and try characters on for size. When I looked at it that way, it was easy see how Willy Russel came up with the one female character play.

“Hello wall.”

Writers must use memories. Knowing makes a story convincing. I have met mature writers in internet chat rooms who say they couldn’t have written well in their twenties because their younger self hadn’t done much.

If you are a young aspiring writer, don’t let the last comment put you off. Keep practising your writing skills but remember this…

Twenty-seven years ago a neighbour gave me the best example of writing badly through lack of knowledge.

I asked her to look at a piece of writing. She had been reluctant. Having read my short story, she repented and told me why she had been so horrified by my request.

Someone had asked her to read their work before and it had proved embarrassing.

Over all, the gentleman’s writing was good but the dialogue between a husband and wife was awkward and stilted.

When she worked up the nerve to tell him it ruined his work, he said he hadn’t ever really had a long-term relationship.

This is why I make

Avatars

I prefer to make avatars based people I know. I may change their appearance, but use their voice, speech patterns and general mannerisms. If you’re not good at remembering what colour eyes you chose for a character, this method works just as well in reverse.

Graham Greene’s character, Wormald, did this in Our Man in Havana.

He didn’t have the nerve to spy but knew verifiable facts would be needed, if he were to convince MI6 he had completed missions and had contacts.

He looked for people in phone books and at his Country Club, studied their activities and built stories around them.

Greene knew Wormald would have to create avatars to tell a convincing tale.

That is what writers do. They soak up their surroundings, people and activities and pour it into their imagination until it flows onto a page.

Research Could Save You.

Even when you know your subject inside out, you’ll still have to approach with caution. Check every detail if you have the slightest doubt.

I wrote a book using a mispronunciation, which was allowed by Bengali relatives in my childhood and was never corrected. Thankfully, it was discovered during an edit by a professional.

It was a cringe worthy experience. As a result, I write with my phone next to me and check everything I can.

Google search what you ‘know’ and you find hidden meanings. You may find you didn’t know it at all.

My mother was a good technical writer but was embarrassed to find she had always spelt veranda incorrectly in her published travel journals. She was also inconsistent with her spelling of Lungi.

After copy typing her South East Asia work, I wasn’t sure which of her multiple spellings were correct. It made me realise another important fact.

If you have decided how to spell a foreign word with uncertainty, use the same spelling throughout. If it’s wrong, it will be easier to find all and replace.

Back on subject…

Gerald Durrell wrote My Family and Other Animals with ease because he was the boy in the book who kept scorpions in a match box.

By the same token James Herriot had hands on experience putting his arm in places most of us wouldn’t dream of going. He changed the name of his eccentric employer, in a Yorkshire veterinary practice, and spoke his hilarious truth, tinged with genuine misgivings about the approach of WW2.

Often we forget, knowing can lead to genius which changes cultures.

Many authors think of Jack Kerouac as a cliqued example. Time has moved us on and so did Kerouac when he used his service pension to travel after his return from WW2.

Having slummed it across conservative America, actively involving himself with poets and writers of the Beat Generation, Kerouac wrote On the Road in two weeks! He knew exactly where he had been and where it was going.

He was open about his use of unregulated drugs for this purpose. I wouldn’t recommend that route and, if you are considering it, would remind you of the fate of certain actresses of that era.

The best I managed, consuming vats of coffee, was two months. I admit to it being sloppy. Editing it took four months but it was something which was in me and had to come out.

If you’ve never been through life shattering events, I would still say what you know is the best route. It doesn’t have to be Fiction but base it on something from your reality.

If your specialist subject is DIY, share your knowledge. When you conquer a phobia, tell the world how you did.

You may think your choice of topic is of no interest to others. I can assure you that anyone struggling to crochet a chain would be glad of a diagram.

Who knows what really interests others? The shame some might feel about uncontrollable anger could work brilliantly in a horror story or family drama.

Writing is like going for a new job. It’s not going to happen if you decide to rip up the application form before anyone can judge your ability. You have do it and let someone else decide?

Like anything you’ll ever do, you will have to prove relative experience, or gain it, but make sure you know the answers to any possible questions.

 

Not knowing something is only a sin when you try to pretend you do.

I know a very good novelist who last week, on Facebook, asked if people had washing machines in their bathroom or kitchen and if they had a tumble dryer. He also asked which country they were living in.

He writes detective stories and is a very thorough person. He knows you can’t wallpaper over wide cracks and expect it to stick.

Less perfect souls, like myself, are tempted to gloss over defects with good reason. Research is hard work and often results in gathering conflicting information.

This week I began a new piece of work. The idea was simple enough. The setting was a place in France, which I knew in my youth.

What happened next led to two whole days of tiring research.

I had to find out how the Police in France operate.

There turned out to be three different Police forces involved in my story and I had to work out which of them would be responsible for my case. I didn’t know if questions could be answered with a phone call or if my Detective would have to make a six hour journey to conduct an interview. I haven’t got there yet. It’s only a small part of the story but it is necessary to know.

It is going to take me an age to understand the difference between the French Police and the British.

Judges, it seems, are involved in simple murder investigations in France. In some cases they manage the later part of the investigation before it gets anywhere near trial.

Fortunately, I have a friend who knows why the legal system in France has evolved to its present state. I have a lot more reading to do!

The same well learned friend asked a question in jest, when I called her for help and inspiration.

“How is your French, Rachel?”

“Fffing superb at the moment.”  How we rire’d.

To top it all, the French town I knew had a dog poo problem when I was there. The jury is still out about whether it exists today but I am working on it (Yes, it is relevant.)

I also had to look up statistics about Police working with psychics, only to find they don’t.

More mind boggling than that, there have been studies into how the Police should approach and act upon information provided by the psychics they don’t use.

Stranger still, research papers say the Police should not pay psychics but must provide their travel expenses, lunch etc. when they don’t use them. Help!

Sometimes there is no definite answer but, as Rommel use to say, time spent in reconnaissance is seldom wasted. You will learn something new or perhaps find information which will inspire future work.

If you are here for more cleaning tips and a recipe, please see below.

Happy writing. Rachel

Recipe

 May I start with an apology. I know my friends were expecting a Beef and Cauliflower Curry recipe but I had a change of plan, and then some.

During a very brief ‘heat wave’ in the UK, I had been working on some light salad recipes and accompaniments to entice you. Unfortunately it wasn’t to be.

Instead, as the heavens opened, I baked bread to warm the house and had another change of heart on the salad front.

The recipe I decided on was one I used to make when I worked as a baker in Auntie’s Tea Shop in Cambridge.

It’s a quick easy and comforting dish, good for a light lunch or Starter for dinner party guests.

As Auntie’s Tea Shop has long since closed, it’s nice to think we can carry on using some of the wonderful dishes which once drew in cold tourists, office staff and market traders.

I have no desire to return to baking 150 scones + fresh cakes, which would have to be prepared repeatedly, as queues of Graduates and their proud families formed outside the shop, but have many fond memories of the clatter of tea trays and waiting staff banter.

The tea shop was taken over by one of the owner’s sons when she retired and is now The Senate Bar and Bistro.

Here it is, adapted from the original recipe by Yvonne Prevett, founder of Aunties Tea Shop, Saint Mary’s Passage, Cambridge.

Creamy Mushroom Soup

300g Baby Chestnut Mushrooms

(Most white button varieties will do)

1 Small White Onion

1 Stock Cube, Vegetable or Chicken

(I sometimes use half of each, usually Knorr)

½ tspn English Mustard

1 Pint of Milk

½ Pint of boiling water

½ Small Potato

Fresh Nutmeg

Fresh Parsley (Finely Chopped)

Butter + Vegetable Oil

Ground Black Pepper + Table Salt (Rock Salt is too overpowering for the delicate flavour)

Method

1)      Wash the Mushroom. Some prefer to wipe them clean with kitchen towel but these mushrooms are going to be cooked in Milk and Stock, so don’t worry if this is what you usually do.

2)      Chop the onion fairly small. Don’t worry too much, this soup is going to be liquidised or smoothed with a blending wand.

3)      Place a knob of Butter, with a small amount of Vegetable Oil, in a large pan and melt over a low heat and add the Onion and Mushrooms (Do not brown them, it will affect the colour and flavour of this delicate soup)

4)      Add the Milk, boiling water, English Mustard and crumble in the Stock Cube. (Do not substitute English Mustard with French Mustard. English Mustard becomes mild when heated but French Mustard becomes overpowering and hot)

5)      Grate the ½ Potato into the pan and gently boil for 20 – 30 minutes while you chop a small handful of Parsley.

6)      Grate a small amount of Nutmeg into the soup and taste after a couple of minutes, to see if you would like to add more. (The Nutmeg should not be overpowering. It is added to enhance the flavour of the Mushrooms)

7)      When you are sure the Potato has dissolved, remove the pan from the heat and allow to cool a little before blending it to a smooth, creamy consistency.

8)      Stir in a little of the fresh parsley and season to taste before serving with a fresh bread of your choice.

August Cleaning Tips

Cats, Do We Really Need Them?

Summer time and the living isn’t easy if you have a cat. You’ve usually got over them losing their winter coat by the time the heat kicks in and they have another heavy moult.

There seems to be no end to the hoovering and regular flea treatments. If you, like me, have a small cluttered cottage, you may be feeling overwhelmed by August, so here are a few of my top tips to help you through the fluffy season.

Yes, hoovering and grooming really are the two best answers but there are ways to stop the continuous toil.

I put cat blankets over most of my furniture. I buy small light fleecy ones so I can have a cheap mountain of them to swap and wash when they are covered in fur. I favour blankets because they save your furniture when your cute friend heaves up a fur ball.

Line drying will get rid of most of the hair but you could try the following.

·         Put a washing up sponge, with a scourer on one side, in the wash with the blankets/clothes. I know I’m always saying this but please make sure it’s a white dish scourer. This works better than some of the rubbery best sellers, which don’t seem to work at all when you use fabric conditioner.

·         If you have velvet furnishings, use a wet washing up glove to wipe the fur off. It’s really affective and saves you dragging the hoover again.

·         Sticky tape is old but gold. If you are wearing black and your cat sits on you, roll it round your hand, sticky side up, and dab them pesky hairs off. A well rung out clean fibre cloth is good too!

·         Get a hand held steamer with a brush attachment. They are especially good at getting rid of fur on woollens. What’s more, they don’t stretch and mark pullovers the way a traditional iron would. Just put your garment on a coat hanger, good results within minutes.

If you find hoovering is the only solution, its a good idea to get a cylinder vacuum which has a spinning brush head.

Henry Hoovers are good, I’ve used them in the work place, they have a large capacity. I use a Miele Cat & Dog. It is superb on carpets and rugs and cuts my hoovering time by half (Miele Cat & Dogs come in several sizes. The smaller ones work as well as the largest and take up less cupboard space) The bags can be expensive but I have found generic versions which work.

One of my cats is good at over-grooming and coughing up fur balls. If you have this problem and it’s ruining the way you feel about your carpets, I recommend a Vax Compact Power, Lightweight Upright Carpet Cleaner.

I had a Bissell Proheat for years. It had hand attachments, which were good for upholstery. It could cover wide floors without being refilled every five minutes but was heavy. The Vax is for floors only but I am happy with it.

(I may cover carpet cleaners in more detail at another time)

I have ordered a silicon roller with a brush from a well-known online store. It comes with a smaller roller, for removing lint and fur from clothes (this looks good, as it is pocket sized and has a closing lid)

The larger of the two devices is a silicon roller with a brush on it, to gather hair without it floating onto other surfaces. The instructional video claimed you could brush your cat with it, if it consented.

Best of all, you run it under a tap to clean!

If it is any good I will reveal the maker in next month’s post.

The British Airways Hostess Who Built a Children’s Village in Bangladesh

I thought it would be nice to keep the theme of authors and their back stories in this month’s journal but was in a fog.

My mind wandered far and wide for inspiration. It seemed the warmer weather had slowed me down, which made me think of Bangladesh.

In 13 years living in Dhaka, my mother had met many interesting individuals, undergoing various projects.

Ann Hall, my mother’s good friend, had written a book when she had moved back to the UK, to raise money for an animal shelter, The Story of Cheeta (illustrations by Lesley Tidmarsh.)

It didn’t surprise me Ann had done this. She had always raised money in Bangladesh.

She bought next season’s fashion items, with buttons missing, from the back doors of clothing factories, fixed them and held pop-up fashion shows in posh living rooms in Gulshan. We all attended, knowing a bargain when we saw one.

Ann had unlimited energy for a good cause and was known for rallying her troops. I vividly remember her making me sit in a room full of women knitting pink jumpers for street orphans.

I wasn’t very good at knitting and could only produce a mound of squares to make blankets but I did note, when watching documentaries about Dhaka, little boys toiling in the heat by ferries, proudly wearing pink jumpers, clearly fearful of them being stolen.

It proved to me, if you are an orphan in the world’s most densely populated country, you value every asset.

If you watched Soccer Aid 2023 and saw the children attending UNICEF Hubs in Dhaka, a city of nearly 20 million people, you will understand the enormity of the situation.

While these thoughts meandered through my head, it struck me how daft I had been and I found my subject for July’s Journal.

Pat Kerr

My mother was friends with someone who had written a book about her work with the street children of Bangladesh.

That woman is Pat Kerr, the British Airways Hostess who built a village for orphans and homeless mothers in the tropical countryside.

My parents had arranged for me to visit the village Pat built, shortly after it had been established in 1989, with a group of interested expatriates.

Pat was not there that day but it was a joyous visit.

After a 3 hour drive from Gulshan, in a baking hot mini bus, we arrived at the neatly set out bungalows and were greeted by hundreds of smiling faces.

Every child wanted to hold our hands and proudly show us where they lived.

We were given a show of traditional Bengali dance and songs in one of the school rooms and I was particularly touched by a little girl with disabilities, who said I was nice and wanted to live with me.

A volunteer showed us the village orchard, Lychees were in season. When we entered the large dining hall, there was a mound of red shells brushed up to a wall at one end. Resident women were at its base, helping small children peel and eat the sweet fruit.

We were told every child would be taken in turn to the dining room for one to one time with the women and to partake in the treat.

We were then walked to the edge of the grounds and shown the village’s paddy field. A local man was there with his water buffalo and plough.

He was performing his task free of charge, in searing sun, on his day off. The volunteer told us there had been little opposition to the village being built and many locals were keen to help.

Others were also keen. Molly Reid once turned up at the BHAGA Club House after visiting the Village with a lorry load of biscuits, having struck an amazing bargain with the owner of a factory.

Since opening in 1989 the village has gone from strength to strength, despite discovering some alarming news about the land Pat thought they owned. It is all to the credit of her undeniable stamina.

Pat was a qualified Occupational Therapist in London before swapping her career to become a British Airways stewardess.

She had been on a four day stop-over, at a 5 star hotel in Dhaka, when she decided to venture into the streets and experience the city.

She found street orphans gathered around her, wishing to make her acquaintance and some spare change.

Bangladeshis are the loveliest gently smiling people, who genuinely want to know you, and the children clearly had an impact on Pat.

She decided to ‘give something back’ and took five months unpaid leave to work in an orphanage in the centre of Dhaka.

Families for Children, now a sister charity to the village, had 150 orphans in its care but it was clear to Pat the problem was much bigger. She instantly started fund raising amongst British Airways Crews.

She soon had British Airways involved as a whole and the full support of the Chairman, Lord King.

Pat formed a plan and found as many people as she could to help, buying 13 acres of land at Sreepur, a region accessed by dirt tracks.

What she did next was nothing short of a miracle. She persuaded Lawyers, architects and experts from British Airways to give their services free of charge.

By 1989 she had a village with land for farming and moved 600 children in.

The opening day was attended by President Ershad who, having discovered the village had no electricity or proper access roads, declared he would remedy both issues.

Pat took on poor women, who worked as the mothers of the orphans, cooking and cleaning for a small wage, saved for when they returned to their own communities.

She built schooling facilities and trained women living and working in the village to give them better prospects.

She took the children’s interests very personally and did all she could to encourage them to become what they dreamed of being.

One of her children came to the BHAGA Club for a swim after attending a Karate trial.

Pat makes sure all her children learn to swim.

Bangladesh is only 56.06% land to 43.94% water.

According to The Centre for Injury Preventions and Research, Bangladesh, 19000 people drown each year across the country, approximately 77% are under the age of 18. Pat knew this meant 40 Bangladeshi children drown each day.

Children who have grown up in the village have become Physiotherapists, Nurses, teachers, Sportsmen and coaches and self-employed mechanics to name a few occupations, after a rough start on the streets of Dhaka.

Having worked hard to publicise her cause, Pat had gained a lot of attention by the time she wrote her book, Down to Earth, with Susan Hill.

She couldn’t hide her embarrassment when her book signing, at Heathrow Airport, September 1992, was interrupted by Michael Aspel, who spirited her away to the This is Your Life studios.

More recently Pat was featured on a BBC Scotland documentary, which highlighted a situation which arose in 2019, when Pat was made aware 9 of the 13 acres she bought had been sold fraudulently and were protected Forestry land.

Never a quitter, Pat approached Bangladesh’s female Prime Minister, Sheikh Hasina, who graciously granted her a meeting.

She then packed 300 children into coaches and took them to Parliament and expressed the purpose and needs of the village to Sheikh Hasina in a speech she had learnt in Bengali.

The children put on quite a show and produced a secret petition, asking Sheikh Hasina to make Pat a Bangladeshi Citizen, so she wouldn’t have to keep reapplying for her visa.

(You can watch Pat Kerr: 25 Years On, BBC Scotland, via Google. It includes both the visit to Parliament and Pat’s Wedding Ceremony at Sreepur Village)

The landlord who sold Pat Forestry land was jailed but the problem he caused, having been considered by the relevant authorities, still remained.

Six months after her meeting with Sheikh Hasina, Pat received devastating news. The land would not be transferred or resold to her, as it would set a bad precedent. She then raced to secure a tenancy for the village.

For the time being the women and children of Sreepur are safe but Pat knows that there will come a time when she will no longer be able to run the village.

To this end she is shrewdly training previous residents, who have launched well into IT and Administrative posts and now have families of their own, to run Sreepur.

The sleepy backwater Pat chose for this venture has benefited since President Ershad was forced to make his opening day visit by helicopter.  The farming hamlets, joined by dirt footpaths, have become a town with electricity and transport links, with more diverse job prospects and health care facilities for its inhabitants.

Down to Earth by Pat Kerr is advertised on Google as being available from:

Amazon UK

Transportstore.com

Abebooks.co.uk

Blackwells.co.uk

If you would like to know more about this incredible woman and her work, feel free to look up:  https://www.sreepurvillage.org/

I for one have enjoyed reading about the women of the village learning to use online banking and seeing their beautiful hand crafted goods.

I really hope Pat’s children will be able to sustain her efforts in the future, with the help of their sister charity Families for Children.

I have only shared a few of the village’s stories but there are many more, Pat’s book is worth a read.

If you are here for more cleaning tips and recipes, look below.

Happy writing, Rachel

Mock Mishti Doi (Easy sweet Bengali Yogurt dessert)

This is an easy dessert, which I like flavoured with one whole green cardamom pod, placed at the bottom of the ramekin or three at the bottom of a larger pot. Some like it with rose water/cordial but, to me, cardamom is more authentic.

This recipe is an adaptation of a ‘windowsill yogurt’ traditional made by reducing milk with cane sugar and mixing in curd, but a simpler version Aunt Tarifa taught my mother.

The object of the exercise is to mimic a hot climate, using a domestic oven. That said, it is important to understand that you are setting the yogurt, not cooking it, so the oven must be turned off before you place the Mishti mixture in it.

Once set and refrigerated it goes beautifully with almond sponge cake or Indian sweets such as Gulab Jamun, which you can buy from Asian shops in most towns. If you can’t find them ready made, you can buy boxes of mix and make your own.

As a stand-alone dish, I could eat Mishti Doi all day long, though it is high in sugar content and probably best kept as a rare summer treat.

Recipe

1  500 gms Pot of plain live Yogurt

1  Medium can of Condensed Milk

1  Can of Evaporated Milk

1  Large oven-proof pot or 14 ramekins

Method

1) Preheat your oven to 400 F or Gas Mark 6

2) Whisk all the ingredients thoroughly until the mixture is smooth and frothy on top.

3) TURN THE OVEN OFF

4) Put the mixture into oven-proof container/s and place it in the oven.

5) Shut the door and leave it overnight. DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR TILL MORNING.

6) In the morning remove the set Mishti pot/s from the oven and refrigerate.

How to Clean Silk/Artificial Flowers Without Water

If you can’t afford to get fresh cut flowers every week but feel your rooms need a bit of colour, fake flowers and plants are a go to. In fact artificial house plants seem to be gaining in popularity and manufacturers are making more and more convincing items.

Like most things, they look great when they are new but as the dust settles can look tired. The main problem is they are difficult to clean without making them look even sadder.

Silk flowers are a bit of a pain to clean. They are often so delicate they couldn’t survive being hoovered and water could ruin their shape and colour.

Most people’s solution is to throw them away but once you’ve got to that point a little trick might be worth a try.

I take a clean plastic shopping bag and put a tablespoon and a half of bicarbonate of soda in the bottom of it. I then hold it tightly shut around the stalks and shake the bag, ensuring the baking powder has a good chance to knock the dust off the petals, then wave the rest of the bicarb off somewhere outside.

Bicarb is a brilliant deodorizer and is light enough not to damage delicate parts.

It’s good for similarly delicate objects. I clean my chiffon Christmas tree fairy using this method. It’s kept her going for 8 years.

Next Month Do We Really Need Cats? Various methods to remove cat hair from clothes and furniture.

Cauliflower and Beef Curry Recipe!

Writer’s Weight Gain!

Things have changed since I hit fifty. I feel like I’m thirty-six but none of my mirrors are working. I bet I’m not the only person who has finished writing a book and finally had time to look in a mirror.

In the past I had a job and wrote in my spare time. The work I did was physical and there were times friends said I was worryingly thin.

When I met my partner he thought I was not eating well, only to discover I eat like a horse. He brought me chocolate trifle and cakes but it made little difference.

The crunch came when he told me he would support me financially if I wanted to quit my day job.

Two years later, I looked down to find my writing journey hadn’t involved many miles. I wasn’t any different to friends who had previously claimed I had a fast metabolism or good genes.

I went back to work for the summer conference season in a Housekeeping Department and my figure returned.

The weight came back when I wrote and published my next two books. This time the mirror told me the same thing as my daughter, who prodded me in the stomach and said,

“You need to do something about that.”

I didn’t think the change would be permanent.

I had gained weight working as a baker in a Tea Shop and had solved the problem by using a boxer’s skipping rope but years of standing had ruined my knees, skipping was no longer an option.

I began to trawl the net to see what could be done and considered dieting.

Many years before, a colleague had told me his relative had self-published a book after inventing a new diet.

Having failed with traditional salad methods Joseph McNally had decided to use the difficulty he suffered with chilli peppers and embarked on a trial period, journaling his findings in a book, S?it Yourself Thin.

I would have given it a go but I had changed from dairy to oat milk and it was doing the same without the pain. What I needed was toning up.

I saw several ladies using Smart Hula Hoops on social media and invested in one. They made it look easy. It wasn’t. It took dedication to learn how to keep the weighted ball, attached by a short length of string to a waist band, spinning.

I doubted I would keep it up, until a gently spoken woman emerged on Facebook.

Kath Routledge and her Smart Hula Hoop started popping up at various locations every day and I began to feel a glimmer of hope.

She had started the group Hooping Awesome on Facebook, to encourage herself and others to commit to a month of hooping. I doubt Kath knew what she had started.

When her group gained a hundred enthusiastic members she seemed shaken, having hoped for ten at best.

She started fun competitions and asked what exercise equipment members had bought, used once, and left in a cupboard.

Group numbers swelled to thousands and Kath was stunned to find she had followers as far away as Canada.

Hooping Awesome became flooded with hoopers giving each other advice and encouragement in difficult moments. Ingenious members shared tips.

Furniture polish was the answer on a sticky hoop. Rocking gently from one leg to the other, as opposed to the mad belly dance I had been doing, got better results. 

I was not brave enough to video myself hooping but many were happy to show off their technique, roping curious neighbours and relatives into their gardens to have a go.

We mourned the loss of a lady’s television set, when she forgot to secure her waist band properly. We laughed with dog owners, whose spaniels thought the spinning ball was intended for their entertainment.

We checked in every day and said how many minutes we had achieved. Members proudly sent pictures of the links they had taken off their hoops, as they got thinner, and we cheered them on.

I got my mojo back, returned to being a size 12 and my posture improved immensely. Somehow this simple exercise made my knees stronger. I couldn’t have been more impressed with the results achieved from very little exertion.

When Kath published a journal for group members to keep a note of their achievements, not only was it appreciated but it came to light she had published other books.

It was of interest to me, having thought often about the background of this quiet unassuming person, who always managed to find the time to respond to comments made on her posts.

Little by little we learnt more about Kath, until I summoned the nerve to message her and ask for more details about her life. I knew she was involved in some sort of therapy but that was about it.

What she told me was even more impressive than her hooping adventure and her story is a good example of how writing shares niche knowledge.

May 2023 saw Kath celebrating her ninth anniversary of a major career change.

Kath told me,

 “I trained as a Relax Kids coach in 2014 after taking voluntary redundancy from my job as I didn’t want to go back to work after having my second child – so a total change in career nine years ago.

I slowly built up my Relax Kids business in Basingstoke and absolutely loved working in schools, preschools, nurseries, in the community and a 1-2-1 basis with families locally.

Then it all changed in March 2020 when schools closed, we went into lockdown and nothing face to face was happening.

         Instead home learning, trying to encourage my children to learn while trying to support their worries; worries we all had during those crazy times. It was a stress for everyone and it got to the point that, as I wasn’t working, I needed to do something, so I embarked on a project to write a book.

In this same time I had signed up to a coaching programme with a high profile fitpro to build up my yoga classes (I’d also recently graduated from my two hundred hours yoga teacher training) but as we went into lockdown I didn’t want to teach yoga online as, for me, I much preferred face to face classes, so instead we focused on my book! And, to be honest, without that accountability I don’t think I would have finished but thanks to Rachel (a fitpro coach) I got it self-published.

The intention for my first book was to be able to support children’s mental health and wellbeing at a time when I couldn’t work face to face in settings, in the community or 1-2-1.”

Kath explained the characters in her books were based on her children. Her eldest child was a bit self-conscious about being identified, as she was going to be starting a new school and thought her mother was going to be a famous author.

Her youngest child, however, was a very willing participant in both the development of the books and social media posts.

Kath continued,

“After this, there was no stopping me! I’ve since added to Yasmine Yogi and Phoebe Bee and written a book to support children transitioning to school – Hollie Hamster Goes to School (Hollie is my daughter’s pet hamster!)

I’ve also self-published a whole load of notebooks/journals.”

Last month Kath celebrated her career change with a record week, relaxing seven hundred children as part of the local schools Wellbeing Week.

As for me, my figure is back under control, having suffered a minor set-back over Christmas.

I have to be realistic, I’m hurtling towards an undesirable age at an astonishing rate.  I’ll stick with hooping, for now. When that doesn’t work anymore I might consider torturing myself with chilli peppers but I doubt it.

If you have tuned in because I promised to teach you how to cook perfect rice or you want to know about my nifty hack for cleaning silver jewellery in minutes, look below.

Happy writing, Rachel.

Perfect Rice Every Time

I have seen rice cooked in many ways.

My least favourite being, what I call, the canteen method, boiled in a sea of salted water and drained into a colander.

There are many people who insist on washing rice a hundred times because, back in the seventies, they were told to wash the starch out of it. Washing the starch out was never the reason, by the way.

In the seventies we used to buy rice in an unwashed state. I can remember relatives bringing us rice from Bangladesh in large green plastic jars with yellow lids. As children it was our job to sift through the rice and pick out stones and other odd things.

Naturally, you would wash rice which entered the home in that condition but modern factories don’t allow it to reach you like that anymore.

Believe me when I tell you, supermarket rice has been washed enough to pour and commence cooking without fear of foreign bodies or starch.

It is so simple to cook rice.

There are no magic measurements, just a simple rule of thumb.  All you need is heat, water and a pan, which is big enough for the rice to expand to three times its size - with a tight fitting lid. A glass lid is especially helpful if you are nervous and tempted to look at the rice!

No matter the amount of rice you are preparing there are only two things to remember.

Thumb

Pour the rice into the bottom of the pan and cover with water.

Rest your thumb gently on the top of the rice, THE WATER SHOULD ONLY COME UP TO THE FIRST RING ON YOUR THUMB.

I know it sounds odd but the fact is it works, no matter how much rice you use or the size of your hands!

Put the rice on your hottest ring and bring it to the boil, until the lid is rattling.

Turn on the smallest burner and get the flame as low as it will go, without being in danger of blowing out. Transfer the rice pan to the smaller burner and cook for 20 minutes.

If you are using an electric hob, do not turn the smallest ring on until the boiling pan is on it (it will still work, trust me)

Do not lift the lid, if you can help yourself.

If you are afraid the rice will stick to the bottom, do not be tempted to stir it like a stew.

If you simply can’t leave it be, pull the pan off the hob and get a fork.

Lift the lid and scrape the fork, quickly, in a zig-zag across the bottom of the pan and, in one sweeping movement, pull the fork around the edge of the pan (turning the rice over) and replace the lid as soon as possible.

If your lowest flame or electric ring is too hot, it is fine to take the pan off the heat when steam holes have appeared in the top of the rice and most of the water has been absorbed.

Leave the rice pan with the lid on for 20 minutes more, it should still cook in its own heat (when I do this I place a folded clean tea towel over the lid to try and keep as much of the steam in as possible)

The biggest thing to remember is that once the rice is on the lowest possible heat, it doesn’t need you to look at it. Keeping the steam in is the key to success.

If you Want other Ingredients in your Rice

Use exactly the same level of water using your thumb line to measure the level.

I make Pilau Rice with cinnamon quills, green cardamom pods, fried onions and crushed garlic, using the same amount of water.

Once you get used to how much water you need to use you can use this method, using boiling water, to prepare dishes which you would like to have meat in (measure by eye, don’t use your thumb!)

NEVER PUT COLD WATER ON MEAT WHICH IS ALREADY HOT, the change from hot to cold and hot again could encourage bacteria to grow and cause food poisoning.

My favourite rice dish is chicken tikka strips with fried onion, garlic, spices, and peas. I cook this by frying everything in the rice pan and adding rice and BOILING WATER, then treat it exactly the same as boiling plain rice.

Please remember, if you are cooking catering sized amounts of rice, especially with meat or prawns, you must put it into smaller containers to cool to room temperature as quickly as possible before putting it in the fridge.

You should never leave it in a pan to cool if it contains more than 15 large portions. Allowing large volumes of any food to cool to room temperature in vats poses a food poisoning risk.

Clean your Silver Jewellery in Minutes

This hot tip has saved much of my old silver filigree jewellery from Bangladesh.

It works using a mild chemical reaction, rather than rubbing with metal polish, which is often impossible with smaller pieces of jewellery.

When I use the word chemical, I am referring to a simple reaction rather than the use of actual chemicals.

You will Need

Boiling water

Bicarbonate of Soda

Malt Vinegar

A pair of thick rubber gloves

A drop of washing up liquid (dish detergent, USA)

A large piece of aluminium foil (enough to make a ball the size of a tennis ball)

A soft LINTLESS cloth (not fibre cloth, it will catch on clasps etc.)

Method

Get a bowl and fill it with freshly boiled water and ad half a mug of malt vinegar and a drop of washing up liquid.

Add a level dessertspoon of Bicarbonate of Soda.

Crush the aluminium foil into a loose ball and drop it into the bowl.

Immediately drop the jewellery into the bowl and leave for two minutes at the most.

Take the jewellery out, rinse it with clean warm water and rub gently with the soft cloth.

Most of the tarnish should be removed. You may dip the items several times until you are satisfied.

When you have finished you can unfold the foil. If the process has worked properly you will see the foil has attracted the black tarnish to itself, even from the finest detail of the smallest piece of jewellery, removing the need to scrub delicate details with a damaging brush.

How clever is that?

More cooking and cleaning tips in next month’s journal.                   

 

How to Write when you Can’t Spell

There are many things that get in the way of the desire to write.

Perhaps spelling is not your strong point, you’re dyslexic, you read slowly, someone made you nervous about reading and writing or English isn’t your first language.

English is my language but was something I feared.

It’s not easy. Part French, Gaelic, Nordic and Latin makes for illogical spelling. I have friends from other countries who say their written language is self-explanatory and I envy them.

It is easy to be discouraged, being laughed at is the worst. You must get past cruel experiences and find ways to make it happen.

I was in my mid-twenties when I decided to write long notes about things which interested me. I would have never thought of doing it but my boyfriend, at the time, released me from fear.

He had found several screwed up notes in the kitchen bin. They all said the same thing in different ways. The next time he saw me he held up the disregarded notes and asked me what was going on.

I got a knot in my stomach.

He was a student at The Slade School of Fine Art, UCLU, I was a cook in the Student Union. I thought I had been caught pretending to be something I wasn’t.

He said he would have understood all the notes. What perplexed him was my shame and he wanted to know the reason for it.

I told him about the ‘remedial’ classes and my mother’s, apparently, hilarious public declarations about my spelling.

Everything came out, from people asking me if I was going to take another year to read the book they’d lent me, to refusing to apply for promotion because I couldn’t stand the thought of all the paperwork which would follow.

What he told me changed my life.

He said people had no right to laugh at me. He pointed out, some people are good learners but don’t have creative ideas.

He loved the songs I wrote and asked me, if I had had to submit them in writing before being allowed to perform them, would I have written them?

Trapped in a world full of boiling pots and pans, song writing was my only joy. I spent hours describing my thoughts with words I couldn’t spell.

My career and hobby didn’t mix. I often came out of a moment of blissful creativity to the smell of something burning. I was artistic when piping writing onto cakes but came to grief when asked to decorate a birthday cake for a lady called Siobhan. I had to live with not being good at anything.

Change came when, against advice from friends, I attended a selection day for a Journalism course at a Regional College. I sat a written exam and waited for my rejection letter. I was astonished when I was invited to return for an interview.

When the big day arrived my childminder let me down.

Determined not to fail by default, I took my baby into the interview room at the very moment she had, what can only be described as, a bumsplosion.

With nothing left to lose, I spoke freely. I was told I had ‘fire in my belly’ and my acceptance letter was a formality. ”it had happened and I got over it.

I didn’t undergo an overnight transformation. I still find it difficult to spell but it was the beginning of realising there are solutions to difficulties.

I want to share some things which helped me, in the hope they will encourage someone else to forget what they might have been told they can do.

I’ve added a few extras which weren’t available in the nineties. Technology could be the answer for many.

If you know someone who struggles with writing, please help. Don’t snigger at them. Tell them Rome wasn’t built in a day. We all have things we have yet to learn.

Game Changers

·         Defocussing

This means, staring into the centre of a paragraph. You will be surprised at how much information you pick up without having to read every single word.

We were taught this in Study Skill classes because Journalism involves sifting through a lot of information quickly. It made my reading speed pick up beyond expectation.

We would be given large paragraphs and told we had a certain amount of seconds to look into the centre of them.

When time was up we were asked to write down key points we had gathered at a glance. I was astounded by the amount of words I took in subconsciously and practicing this technique stopped me from reading left to right. I began to devoir books and that is the secret to increasing vocabulary.

·         Read as much as you can

Read things which would normally be outside your scope. Make sense of it without thinking you’ve got to understand every word. I guarantee you will learn something, if not everything, the writer intended.

Kindle is really good. It has a dictionary built into it so you can check the meaning of words without leaving the page.

Hold your finger on the word you don’t understand. It will take a few seconds to give an explanation of most words.

If you don’t have a Kindle there is a free Kindle App, which you can download to your phone.

Once you have the Kindle App, it will often open downloaded documents without being prompted and you can use the Kindle dictionary to read them. Bonus!

·         Attempt Crosswords

They are in newspapers and magazines and the internet is full of them. Crossword puzzles are repetitive and will give you both the spelling and meaning of words.

The best approach is to go after smaller, linking words. Going through all the three letter clues first will lead to more success. Don’t be hard on yourself if you can’t complete a puzzle. Try again tomorrow and you will get better. It’s all about training your brain.

·         Learn how to Touch Type

This is the most helpful thing you can do if you want to write a lot.

I hear you sigh, but I downloaded a game where you learn to type by playing Space Invaders.

You start by shooting down basic letters as they appear and end up typing entire words. You learn without thinking about how to spell.

If all this Seems too Difficult

It doesn’t matter how you make notes. The most important thing is to get the words down as they come to you.

To this end, most phones have a recording feature on them. Tell your phone what you want to say and it will spell for you. You could download one of the following

·        Dragon by Nuance (Android. iOS, macOS,     Windows)

·         Gboard (Android, iOS)

·        Google Docs voice typing (Web on Chrome)

Did you know there’s probably a Read Aloud function on your computer? There are YouTube videos about how to use it.

YouTube is good for spelling too. Lots of helpful people have taken the time to tell you the difference between words like disgust and discussed. You shouldn’t ever feel stuck.

Whatever you want to write, I hope you find the courage to do it.

If you were enticed back to my Journal by the promise of a Curry Recipe and cleaning tips, here they are.

Happy writing, Rachel x

Chicken and Sweet Potato Curry

(Chickpeas can be used instead of Chicken)

Ingredients

 1 Onion

2 Chicken Breasts (or 1 can of Chickpeas)

1 Sweet Potato

2 Tomatoes

2 tsps. Coconut Oil or Coconut Cream

1 Cinnamon Quill

5 Green Cardamom Pods

4-5 Cloves of Garlic

1 heaped dspn Medium Madras Curry Powder

1 Thumb-sized piece of Fresh Ginger, peeled and finely grated, or liquidised.

(Ground Ginger Powder will do!)

½ tsp. of Harissa Spice

Garden Peas (a small handful)

Salt and Pepper, to taste

A kettle of boiling water

Method

1/Cut the onion into medium to large dice and fry on a low heat with vegetable oil and the Coconut Oil. Do not let them brown, they only need to become translucent.

2/Add large dices of chicken breast or chickpeas to the pan. Please make sure chickpeas are well drained as water and oil can make a pan fire.  Add the Cardamom Pods and Cinnamon Quill at this point.

3/ Add the ginger and the curry powder. It will stick to the bottom of the pan. Keep it moving, scraping it from the pan with a wooden spoon, whilst allowing it to char a coat the chicken/chickpeas.

4/ Cover with boiling water and add the Harissa Spice and Peas.

5/ Peel and cut the sweet potato into large chunks and add them to the pan. Make sure that some of the sweet potato is cut into slithers, this will help to thicken the liquid to make a thin sauce (if the sauce becomes too thick and sticky during cooking, you can add a little boiling water to thin it down)

6/ Cut the Tomatoes into 4 pieces (I prefer to remove the seeds, but it’s not essential)

7/ Crush the Garlic and add it to the pot with the Tomatoes

After 20 minutes, check the largest bit of Chicken is fully cooked in the middle. If you are using Chickpeas, make sure they are soft. Add salt and pepper to taste.

When you are sure the Chicken/Chickpeas and the Sweet Potato are cooked properly, serve with Basmati Rice and thinly sliced slivers of Cucumber, with or without Natural unsweetened Yogurt.

This Month’s Cleaning Tip

Stubborn stain on your enamel sink or bathtub?

There’s nothing more annoying than seeing a stain on enamel when you’ve scrubbed it for hours.

Things like cans of Shaving Foam leave rust rings. Hair dye and fake tan take to small scratches on enamel just as easily as they do hair and skin.

Here are the dos and don’ts if your bathroom is looking less than perfect.

Don’t

Use harsh cream cleaners. They only make more tiny scratches for stains to cling to.

Don’t use metal or coloured scouring pads in bathrooms. Metal pads make grey scratch lines and coloured scouring pads leave their colour on grout.

If limescale is attracting dirt, don’t use harsh chemicals or damage your surface by trying to scratch it off with scrapers or knives. Malt Vinegar is perfect. Just pour it onto the scale or soak cotton wool with it and stick it to the scale.

You may have to do it twice but you’ll see an improvement

I would not recommend leaving it on for hours. You don’t want to ruin the finish on your taps or shower head but applying it several times for a couple of minutes, then rinsing thoroughly will work, especially if you buff the area with a dry cloth immediately after.

Do

Use TOOTHPASTE with a dry cloth. It’s designed to remove stains from enamel and works so much better than most chemical cleaners.

If you feel you must use a scouring pad, use a white one.

There are other beauty products in your bathroom which are useful for removing indelible marks.

HAIRSPRAY on a dry cloth removes felt-tip pen marks from bath panels and silk or gloss finish surfaces. It takes a bit of effort but it’s sticky and grabs the dirt.

NEXT MONTH: How to cook perfect rice without a rice cooker and a nifty trick to get your silver jewellery clean in minutes.

Suffering from Imposter Syndrome?

Imposter Syndrome is the blight of writers who would separate the word ‘writer’ from themselves, despite proof they have written something. It can fill a writer with feelings of inadequacy. Questions arise. Are they the next Dickens or will people think they are playing at it?

My advice is that every word written is part of a journey. Writers treat their work as an experiment until many hours of self-criticism and editing bring them something they feel others will find credible.

The way I look at it is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Originality is born from your own view point but I think it’s fair to say most writers are tempted to throw away the best part of their idea if it sails close to something they have dug up during research into their plot or style.

I’ve lost count of the amount of Google searches which have led me to believe the idea in my head was too much like something that had already been written. In this scenario the film Throw Momma from the Train is old but gold. Its ending has always inspired me to continue what I’ve started.

At the end of the film, a serious author feels threatened by his friend having written a book about their shared experience. To his relief his friend has created an illustrated children’s book.

The bottom line is, even when telling a similar story or working within genres, two books can find an audience without being a threat to each other.

While you sweat about whether your version will be good enough, you would do well to remember what most writers know. Few people within your circle really care about your book, unless you are writing something which exposes an uncomfortable fact about them.

Joni Mitchell once wrote, love is a story told, to our friend its second hand.

Like romantic love, your work consumes you but telling its intricate workings will only make your friends glaze over.

My partner works in Construction and hasn’t read a book since leaving school. When I waved my Authors Copy of How They Shone at him, he was pleased for me and even offered to take me out for dinner, but also said,

“It looks like a book, I’ll never read it.”

You need to develop thick skin and realise you are travelling alone. Don’t expect or need your friend’s approval and don’t listen to a single word from your relatives about their idea of success.

If you have the strength to stop cringing about the fact you may never need an agent or accountant, and decide to write, you are a writer. What is important is freedom of expression.

To that end I can’t be an imposter. I know who I am. I have written things that I think are awful. I’ve written things perhaps only I thought of as brilliant, but I have written.

There would have been a time when a semi-literate chef who ended up working in College Housekeeping Departments, the lower end of the career scale in Cambridge, in order to have time to write, would have been a joke to onlookers.

If I ever thought to tell anyone I had started writing the response was always the same.

A long list of ideas to gently guide me towards something I might be more suited to. Recipe books for people who don’t know how to cook curry. No stereotyping there, my father was a very successful Indian restaurant accountant. Or, perhaps I would be better off giving advice on stain removal and hygiene.

People’s perception of me and concern for my well-being was overwhelming. They all knew me to be bad at spelling.

I doubt anyone thought me capable of writing 86,000 words about anything, yet alone the story of a boy whose life was devastated by the partition of India.

Nor would they have thought that I would know about East Pakistan, the forming of the People’s Republic of Bangladesh, and the minefield of mixed Anglo Bangladeshi marriages, but that’s what I wrote about.

Having lost my father in 2018, that’s all I wrote about for a year, while my partner slept in ignorant bliss.

My father died in Dhaka, Bangladesh. They bury within two days there. I couldn’t attend and I have no headstone to lay flowers by. How They Shone was my place to mourn.

When my mother died two years later, she asked that her ashes be disposed of at sea, so she could go travelling after Lockdown. This left me in a similar position regarding not having anywhere to place flowers.

My mother had been a prolific travel writer for a small publication, The Hardship Post, during her thirteen years in Bangladesh. When I found she had kept her writing, I made another headstone for my parents and published Jill’s Journey, The Unusual Life and Travels of Jill Rahman, South East Asia.

To keep the creative juices going, I wrote The Shard Puzzle, a small bit of creative writing about what it’s like to be stalked and not believed. You could think of it as being a head stone to the courage of people who just don’t get the help they should.

It doesn’t matter why I did it, how I did it, or whether there is going to be a film made about it. The fact is, I did it.

I self-published three books, using YouTube videos and Print on Demand services, at very little expense.

I went from being a College Housekeeper to doing the job of a hundred people in a publishing house, all experts in their particular field. I designed covers, picture edited and got published by hook or by crook, for better or worse. Having gone to all that trouble, I don’t suffer from imposter syndrome and I don’t see any good reason for anyone else to.

Ask anyone if they would be comfortable telling their fantasies or personal feelings to complete strangers. It’s a big deal to choose to share what goes on inside your head. It takes guts and, if that’s what you’ve chosen to do, you shouldn’t feel belittled by a stranger’s opinion.

If you aren’t convinced I took the right path, the only advice I can give you is this:

Don’t fry the garlic with the onions when you start a curry. It makes it dark and bitter. Crush it and add it after the liquid ingredients.

Pouring white wine on spilt red wine won’t do anything more than increase the mess. Try a Bissell Pro Heat carpet cleaner as soon as the accident happens. It’s the only way to stop your rug turning pink.

Last but not least, NEVER use an explosive mixture of Bicarbonate of soda, vinegar and hot water to unblock a sink. Chemists will tell you, this combination will produce an amazing fountain in the plughole. They will also tell you it will create a kind of white acetate, which will flow further down the drain and require the services of Dyno Rod.

If you have found the last three paragraphs more interesting than the rest of this month’s Journal, I will provide a curry recipe in the next one.

Happy writing, Rachel x